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Showing posts from November, 2020

Abused Children and Betrayal Trauma Theory - A Very Deep Wound

  Betrayal Trauma Theory Summary Betrayal trauma theory posits that there is a social utility/ advantage in remaining unaware of the abuse when the perpetrator is a close caregiver such as a parent (Freyd, 1994, 1996). The theory draws on studies of social contracts (e.g., Cosmides, 1989) to explain why and how humans are excellent at detecting betrayals and ethical violations at a very early age however, Freyd argues that under many circumstances detecting them and then protesting the trauma betrayals would be counter-productive to the survival of the helpless child. Specifically, in cases where a victim is dependent on a caregiver, survival may require that she/he remain unaware of the betrayal otherwise, the all-important parental bond is threatened.   In the case of any traumatic childhood abuse of any kind, a child who is aware that her/his parent is being abusive may withdraw from the relationship (e.g., emotionally or in terms of proximity). For a child who is dependant on a

Worth Remembering - Christopher Lasch b. 1932 d. 1994

                        Christopher Lasch - "The Culture of Narcissism"   - 1979                         Lasch's central point was that the West, and especially the US, is                       tending toward becoming a mass of narcissists. Not a society, nor a                       nation, but just a large group of alienated individuals lacking the                       socialization required to become really human.                         Becoming a proper human requires seeing oneself as part of a whole                       or several wholes. One is, at the present, a part of society, a                       nation, a family, and other groups. One is also, in a timeline, the                       successor to his ancestors and past Americans, and the ancestor and                       predecessor to those yet to come. Lasch saw this socialization process as being destroyed by a number                       of forces. Schools, mass media, and &q

The Harm of the Soul of Children by a Narcissistic Personality Disordered Parent(s)

  How a Parent's Narcissistic Personality Disorder Affects Their Child   Narcissistic Parent Checklist: Signs of Being Raised by a NPD 1.     Children of NPD parents blame themselves.  Instead of blaming the parent, a loving child might take on the responsibility for the negativity and sacrifice their self esteem. They begin to believe it's their own fault their parent does not love them, or they hold out hope that by changing themselves, they might earn their parent's love. 2.     They feel invisible.  These children may have no sense of themselves or what they want or need. The parent's grandiosity eclipsed the child so completely that it resulted in a person who has no idea who they really are as an individual. 3.     They become so acclimated to narcissism they may either choose narcissistic relationships or avoid relationships entirely.  The neglect, abuse, rage, lack of empathy, and emotional games can be so overwhelming they can make a child grow to exp

A Very Brief Intro to the Life of a Narcissist Over the Life Span

              The development of the Narcissistic ego structure, as a grouping of defense mechanisms, begins with the splitting defense mechanism.  The narcissist fails to view other people, situations, and entities i.e. political parties, countries or race, as a compound of both good and bad elements.  He either idealizes his object or he denies their very existence.   Things are seen in black and white.  The object is either all good or all bad .  The bad attributes are always projected, displaced or otherwise externalized. The good ones are internalized in order to support the inflated grandiose self-concept of the narcissist and his grandiose fantasies as well are to avoid the pain of deflation and disillusionment .  The narcissist pursues narcissistic supply i.e. attention both positive and negative and uses it to regulate his fragile fluctuating sense of self-worth.   The issue of separation of individualization.     According to psychodynamic theories and psychosocial

The Cognitive Decline of the Aging Narcissism – Failure to ever develop a REAL AUTHENTIC SELF

    <img>     The Cognitive Decline of the Aging Narcissism – Failure to ever develop a REAL AUTHENTIC SELF   Pathological narcissism, life-crippling narcissism is a defense mechanism intended to isolate the narcissist from his environment and to shield him from emotional hurt and injury, both real and imagined. Hence the False Self - an all-pervasive psychological construct (the Big Self- Deceptive Lie) which gradually displaces the narcissist's True Self. It is a work of fiction intended to elicit praise and deflect criticism. The unintended consequence of this fictitious existence is a diminishing ability to grasp reality correctly and to cope with it effectively. Narcissistic supply replaces genuine, veritable, and tested feedback. Analysis, disagreement, and uncomfortable facts are screened out. Layers of bias and prejudice distort the narcissist's experience. Yet, deep inside, the narcissist is aware

Institutional Trauma Betrayal - "Deny, Attack, and Reverse the Victim and Offender" - DARVO

  What is Institutional DARVO? DARVO stands for "Deny, Attack, and Reverse the Victim and Offender."   The perpetrator/victimizer first Denies their malevolent/criminal  behavior, then Attacks the individual doing the confronting or Whistle Blowering, then Reverse the roles of Victim and Offender such that the perpetrator assumes the victim role and turns the true victim -- or the whistleblower -- into an alleged offender/ wrong-doer through smearing,  recruiting minions  and denigrating and re-victimizing the victim   This occurs,  when an actually guilty perpetrator assumes the role of the "falsely accused" and attacks the accuser's credibility and reputation and blames the accuser of being the perpetrator of a false accusation. Institutional DARVO occurs when the DARVO is committed by the institution (or with institutional collusion and complicity ) as when the police charge rape victims with lying when she actually has been raped by one of their own

MALIGNANT NARCISSISTS - Donald Trump & his Supporters

  MALIGNANT NARCISSISTS - Donald Trump & his Supporters – Their Mutual Collective Psychosis Psychologically speaking, Donald Trump is what is called a 'malignant narcissist. ' A narcissist is someone who has become hypnotized and entranced by their own inflated self-image . They have become so self-absorbed that not only are they not in genuine relation with others, but they relate to others (including the environment) as objects to satisfy their own need for self-aggrandizement. A 'malignant' narcissist, however, is a narcissist who reacts sadistically to others who don't support and enable their narcissism. For example, instead of self-reflecting and taking in critical feedback, the Trump administration reacts with ruthless contempt for anyone who disagrees with him or her . Like a mean and cruel-spirited malignant narcissist, Trump and Co., denies the accusation and tries to destroy the messenger . Ultimately , a malignant narcissist wants to