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Showing posts from 2018

My own Experience of Group Narcissistic Mobbing at a previous Worksite

A few notes from my once toxic past regarding a previous sadistic employer and the many minions that enabled and did the malicious dirty work to terminate my career and ruin my reputation after my exposing / reporting on a series of patient assaults over many months by a co-worker with friends in high places. I was fired for whistle-blowing the Truth. It was a political vendetta for refusing to keep this one secret of the Program’s, many, many secrets. It was hate speech in an echo chamber. They have denied my humanity and dignity with impunity. What do you think they do to the public they are supposed to serve? What could be a more basic act of patient advocacy than reporting physical abuse of your patients by a colleague? It is all about controlling the narrative by smear and lies against me to defect, deceive and distort the truth of their responsibility and culpability of overt patient abuse that was entirely condoned. It was obvious when I first came to this region t

Psychodynamics of Scapegoating, Persecution, Bullying

  Psychodynamics of Scapegoating, Persecution, Bullying Evil when we are in its power is not felt as evil but as a necessity, or even a duty. Simone Weil. Gravity and Grace. 1947. Everywhere the human soul stands between a hemisphere of light and another of darkness. Thomas Carlyle. When love and hate clash, either we feel guilt and make appeasment, or we are persecuted by guilt. Or we can pervert the truth.. Holman Hunt. The Scapegoat Scapegoating in group psychotherapy is scene as an example of projective identification. The seeking of a scapegoat in a group can be seen as a form of resistance, or defence against impulses, wishes or behaviour that needs to be repressed, denied, or in some way removed from consciousness as belonging to the self. The scapegoat is always reacted to because he demonstrates traits that other group members reject. The group-selected scapegoat may have been a scapegoat in his family of origin, and he may have displayed pr

A Good Review of Enmeshment

What is Enmeshment? 9/17/2017 49 Comments What is an "Enmeshed" Family? Salvador Minuchen introduced the concept of "enmeshed" families in his family systems theory in the mid-1970s.  There are varying degrees of enmeshment, when it does exist .  An enmeshed family allows individual members little to no autonomy or personal boundaries.  The roles among family members can be very rigid. One person might be "the scapegoat," another person might be "the hero " and so on. These roles are not explicitly assigned. It's usually an unconscious process and much more subtle than that. The point is that individuals in this type of family often grow up not knowing how they really feel or what they want to do in their lives because they are  encouraged to feel whatever the rest of the family feels  (usually initiated by one or both of the parents) and strongly discouraged from developing their own feelings and preferences. What are the Conseq

The lifetime effects on Adult Children of a Narcissistic Parent

So how does the   Narcissistic Parent affect their children? The child won’t feel heard or seen. They feel invisible to their parent. In adult life, they will go on to feel invisible and dismissed  from everyone around them The child’s basic feelings and reality will not be acknowledged, basis feelings such as anger. These basic feelings will be invalided, the child will be shamed by the parent in having them at all. The child in turn will dedicate themselves to regaining the lost parents love by going silent, becoming the obedient child,  becoming the role of the 'good little boy'. Eventually their entire emotionally system  withers and dies, as it has been shamed, leaving the child feeling defective and joyless, loveless.    The child will be treated   as an accessory to the parent, rather than a person. They become only an extension, a ‘self-object’ to the parent. The child will be more valued for what they do (usually for the parent) than for

Notes on the Narcissists Smear Campaigns

Narcissists & Psychopaths in Your Family - Surviving their Smear Campaign What is a smear campaign? What is a narcissistic smear campaign? If you've ever been unfortunate enough to be targeted by a malignant narcissist,  or group of unified narcissists, then you already know what it is. For those of you who don't know, a smear campaign is when the narcissist[s] attempts to cause you problems, turn other people against you, and basically ruin your life with lies. They might tell other people you are crazy, that you are abusive, that you are a drug user, a bad parent... whatever is the exact opposite of what you actually are. It's important to pay attention to exactly which lies they are telling, because these lies typically reveal their underlying rationale. Whatever they are trying to destroy about you is the thing they are jealous of. For example: If they are telling everyone you are a bad parent, it is because the narcissist sees you as a better parent than

A Bully in the Workplace - Basic Concepts

A Bully in the workplace           Basic Concepts The Bully is at the source of stress. They are the trigger,  the stressor. How the Body and Mind respond to this (these) stressors determines the extent of damage inflicted. The sequence of Biological stress is well known. There are three stages: 1. The Alarm: The turning on of the body's defense systems that are designed to be brief for it is truly widespread in its effect through the body. It enables the ‘flight or fight’ response in the face of danger both physical and psychological. The body reacts the same to fright from the impending pounce of a tiger as it does to the insult from of Workplace Bully.  Alarm triggers the sympathetic nervous system and the Releases of Adrenaline, in addition to many other functions. 2. Resistance. The maintenance of an alert stage of the body. Resistance to the bully and all that that this requires depletes the body's defenses. If you stay in Resistance too long, the body

Workplace Bullying - Nature and Characteristics

Workplace Bullying Intro Bullying is constant criticism , nitpicking , faultfinding , refusal to value , undermining , being singled out , isolated , excluded , marginalized , overruled , belittled , humiliated , threatened, overloaded , your work and credit for it is stolen , responsibility increased but authority is taken away , v acation r equest refused , training denied , unrealistic goals and deadlines , hypocrisy , duplicity , fabrication , distortion , twisting everything you say and do , abuse of disciplinary processes and procedures , verbal and written warnings for trivial or fabricated reasons , coercion in to early or ill - health retirement , unfair dismissal . Embittered by a background of being victimized in an abusive relationship themselves they go out into the world seething with resentment . The serial bully displays an obsessive , compulsive and self-gratifying urged t